ArtDayMe :  Dr. Maryam Delavar, founder and director of Nikoo International School, emphasized the importance of fostering intellectual independence and decision-making skills in children. She stated: “One of the most important missions of the education system is not simply to educate students who know the right answers, but to nurture individuals who can think, make choices, and take responsibility for their decisions.”

Maryam Delavar added that independence in adulthood is the product of formative childhood experiences. “We cannot expect a child to grow into an independent, responsible adult capable of making decisions if, throughout the years when their personality is taking shape, others have consistently made decisions on their behalf and deprived them of the opportunity to experience making choices.”

- The Difference Between Raising a Child and Controlling Their Life

The founder and director of Nikoo International School noted that the boundary between caring for a child and controlling their life is not always clearly defined. Adults often limit children's freedom to choose under the well-intentioned belief that they are protecting them. In such circumstances, children gradually learn to wait for the approval and decisions of others rather than trust their own abilities.

Maryam Delavar emphasized: “Raising a child does not mean removing every difficulty from their path. Rather, it means creating a safe environment in which they can experience, experiment, make mistakes, and learn from the consequences of their choices. If we constantly remove every obstacle from a child's path, we also deprive them of the opportunity to develop the ability to confront life's challenges.”

- Beginning-of-Year Class Assignments: A Recurring Example of a Global Pattern!

Maryam Delavar referred to certain parental interventions in the everyday processes of school life, stating: “One of the less visible ways in which children's independence is restricted is through the repeated interference of adults in situations where students should be given the opportunity to experience, adapt, and solve problems themselves.

“For example, some parents insist on changing their child's class at the beginning of the academic year for reasons such as having their preferred friends in the same class, being placed alongside particular students, or even personal perceptions of the class composition. Such demands can deprive children of opportunities to adapt to their environment and establish new social relationships.

“These interventions sometimes extend to students' friendships as well: from deciding whom their children should be friends with to interfering in ordinary disagreements between classmates, choosing their child's group members for academic activities, determining how they participate in group games, and even resolving the smallest misunderstandings on their behalf.”

Maryam Delavar pointed out: “Parental support is constructive when it helps children understand a situation for themselves and find a way to resolve it, rather than having adults step in on their behalf and manage all their social relationships. Alongside families, schools must also create an environment in which children gradually learn communication, adaptability, conflict resolution, and the ability to choose their own social relationships.”

- The Right to Choose: One of the Foundations of Personality Development

The director of the international school in Tehran highlighted the importance of choice in children's development, stating: “Making choices is a skill that must be learned. We cannot expect someone who has had no experience making decisions during childhood to suddenly possess sound judgment, independent thinking, and a sense of responsibility in adulthood.”

According to Maryam Delavar, the right to choose should be defined in accordance with a child's age, cognitive abilities, and stage of development. Choosing between educational activities, deciding how to complete an assignment, or participating in determining aspects of daily schedules are examples of opportunities that can help strengthen this skill.

She added: “What matters is that children feel their opinions and choices are valued, while also learning that every choice comes with responsibilities and consequences.”

- School: An Environment for Practicing Independence and Responsibility

The founder of Nikoo International School emphasized the role of the educational environment in shaping students' personalities, noting: “School should not merely be a place for transferring information and measuring learning outcomes. It should also provide an environment in which students have opportunities to experience independence, participation, dialogue, and decision-making.”

Maryam Delavar stated: “In a dynamic educational environment, students should be able to ask questions, express their views on different issues, participate in group activities, and even propose their own solutions when confronted with a problem. Such experiences teach them that they are not merely recipients of instructions; they can also play an active role in shaping their own learning journey.”

- Should Children Always Make the Right Choices?

Maryam Delavar addressed one of the challenges of fostering independence in children, stating: “Sometimes adults allow children to make choices only when they are certain that the child's decision will be the one they themselves prefer. In reality, this kind of choice is more like seeking approval than practicing independence.”

Delavar added: “If children are only allowed to choose between options whose outcomes have already been predetermined, with no possibility of experiencing a different result, we cannot expect them to develop genuine decision-making skills. Of course, this does not mean transferring all responsibilities to children. Rather, a balance must be established between age-appropriate freedom and responsible adult supervision.”

- Making Mistakes: An Essential Part of the Learning Process

The director of Nikoo International School stressed the need for families and schools to reconsider their attitudes toward children's mistakes, stating: “Making mistakes is a natural part of the learning process. If children are afraid of every mistake or feel that they will be blamed whenever a choice does not lead to the desired outcome, they will gradually withdraw from experimentation and from taking responsibility for their decisions.”

Maryam Delavar noted: “The responsibility of adults is not to correct every decision on behalf of children, but to help them understand the consequences of their choices, reflect on them, and make more informed decisions the next time they face a similar situation.”

- Raising a Generation That Does Not Wait for Instructions

The founder and director of Nikoo International School continued by highlighting the need to reconsider traditional approaches to education. She stated: “Today's world needs individuals who can think in complex situations, identify problems, find innovative solutions, and remain accountable for their decisions. These abilities cannot be developed solely through theoretical instruction and memorization; they require continuous experience within both the family and the school environment.”

Maryam Delavar added: “If we want creative, independent, and responsible students, we must give them genuine opportunities to participate from the earliest years of education. Independence is not a quality that can simply be added to an individual at the end of their schooling; it must be practiced throughout every stage of development.”

- The Future Belongs to Those Who Can Make Their Own Choices

Maryam Delavar emphasized: “The ultimate goal of education should not be to raise children who are constantly waiting for answers, instructions, or approval from others. Schools must help students trust their own abilities, develop analytical thinking, evaluate their choices, and gradually assume responsibility for their own lives.”

In the view of the founder and director of Nikoo International School, one of the most important achievements of education is realized when students leave school carrying not merely a collection of information, but also the ability to think, make choices, and shape an independent path in life.

“Because an independent individual is not made in adulthood alone; the experience of being independent must begin in childhood.”

- Maryam Delavar and Nikoo International School's Active Approach to Creating a Thought-Centered Educational Environment

In conclusion, Maryam Delavar, founder and director of Nikoo International School, discussed the school's educational philosophy, stating: “At Nikoo International School, we strive to make student independence a reality, not as a slogan, but as an integral part of their everyday educational and developmental experience.

“That is why, rather than constantly making decisions on behalf of students, we provide them with opportunities to choose, participate, and gain experience. At the same time, we engage in dialogue with families to help them better understand the boundary between support and interference, allowing their children to develop their own social relationships, manage disagreements, and take responsibility for decisions appropriate to their age.

“At Nikoo School, we believe that the school's responsibility goes beyond teaching children what to know; it must also help them develop the ability to think independently and live independently.”